Crossroads
/I wonder if it's worth it to keep this site.
Read MoreI wonder if it's worth it to keep this site.
Read MoreNocturne is this weekend; I went pretty much every year since I moved here. but it really peaked for me about three years ago. I don't really want to go out by myself (or run into people on the street when alone), but I don't really feel up to making plans with other people this week. It's a free event, so budget isn't a problem, but I just have this overwhelming feeling that art really isn't my thing, no matter how much I want it to be. I guess that makes me a dilettante.
I'm sitting on raw photos I shot in August when I did a "free photoshoot" offer. I'm not especially thrilled that I haven't finished editing them, but when I see what I shot, so little of it is salvageable. Too many out of focus shots. Part of me thinks it's because I'm using a cheapo Opteka portrait lens that won't focus properly at 1.8, but the poor craftsman blames his tools. It could just be my own eyes. I had hoped to supplement my income with photography, but I really don't think I have hustle, skills or tools to make it work right now, nor can I really afford to invest in the latter two. I've been wondering whether I actually enjoy photography, or just the validation that I get when I share the pictures.
I recently read Truth Is Fragmentary by Gabrielle Bell; it's a graphic novel of her travelogues and diaries, including daily comics for the month of July in three different years. There's quite a lot I identified with, particularly her insecurities and anxieties; the tendency to pull away from other people and get lost in the mess of one's own thoughts.
I have more I want to talk about, but I need Tylenol and rest.
Personal website of photographer and writer Bronwyn Douwsma.
I’m on the bus. It’s too early to be human and I haven’t had my coffee yet so I don’t really want to do much; maybe read or listen to music, things that help tune out the other people or the monotony of the commute. When I leave the suburbs, it's usually dark. I sometimes look out the windows, but more to see how far I’ve traveled than at anything interesting. By the time I arrive downtown, I can see the sun coming up over the harbour.
The year is winding down. I’m preparing to go to New Brunswick for my regular Christmas visit with the family; my travel arrangements up there have all been taken care of. I haven’t bothered with Christmas shopping yet; my cash flow was a little tight until my last paycheque came in, and my tolerance for the malls has dropped over the years. Everything costs too much money now.
Looking back at my writing about SNL from years ago, I now feel like I was a bit harsh on the show at times. Maybe it was just disappointment about talented performers being used for the most irritating sketches possible at the expense of their range. It was also partially untreated depression and burnout.
If there was one word to describe the 13th season of SNL, it would be “consistent”. No longer on the bubble thanks to the previous year’s success, SNL in 1987-88 continued pretty much in the same direction as the last season with a little more confidence and a little less to prove.
Sketches include “Pumping Up With Hans & Franz”, “Wilson Trap Doors”, “Church Chat”, “Airline”, “Jorge Garcia, Nice Guy Dictator”, “The Cop & The Prostitute”, “When Great Minds Meet” and “Pirates”. 10,000 Maniacs performs “Like The Weather” and “What’s The Matter Here”.
Sketches include “Calgary 1988”, “Giant Businessman”, “The Bean Cafe”, “The Pat Stevens Show”, “Girl Watchers”, “Computer Panic”, “Casey Kasem Sings The Beatles”, “Delivery Room”, “Stand-Ups III”, and “The Pawn Shop”. Randy Travis performs “Forever And Ever, Amen” and “What’ll You Do About Me”.
It’s been a while since I’ve posted here.