Somewhat out of lockdown...

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I’m back in the office beginning this week. I come downtown every day this week, then on alternating days beginning next week, with me working from home the rest of the time. I like that I can actually take care of things that can only be done at the office, but the commute and general expense of energy (among other things) is taking some getting used to. There are also little things that I have to remember how to do because it’s been so long since I’ve actually been doing them myself.

It’s also very quiet at work because we’re only operating with half the staff actually in the office on any given day (hence the alternating days working from home), as well as the necessary physical distancing measures. I’m OK with this for now; it’s been my normal since March, aside from the occasional Skype chat or video call. Now that I’m making the effort to go downtown, though, I’m feeling like I should be making these trips count for something more than just work. I could feel my social skills atrophy over the last few months; I just don’t feel up to contributing much to conversations these days.

I think I just need to be present around people more than actually contributing to the conversation. A few weeks ago, I had a Zoom call with several old friends from Mount Allison. I tended to listen more than contribute to the conversation, but it was nice to see everyone again (some of whom I hadn’t seen in years, even if we are still connected via social media). Maybe I just need to find more people willing to hold that kind of space for me here until we both feel comfortable enough in each others’ presence to actually converse.

There are a lot of people I “sort of” know around here, or know more online than in the physical world that I would like to get to know better, but somehow my brain doesn’t really let the rest of my body take the steps that would bridge that gap. Maybe that’s for the best while this pandemic thing’s still going on.

I hope these posts give people more of an insight to who I am than I’m otherwise able to present.